I had a dream about you last night.
We were in a large basement, much like the ones at home. You brought home a man in a chic suit. You swore up and down to me that he was a real bird; you really had to take care of him. He clucked and tweeted and sat in a corner of nested blankets. I stared at him viciously, wondering what could possess a man to do such a thing.
You came over with food. "Did you regurgitate it?" I asked. You rolled your eyes at me. "Well that's how you'll feed a grown man acting like a baby bird. You'll just throw up in his mouth." I spat, crossing my arms and tapping my foot. You shook your head and walked away, saying you needed to prepare better food.
I walked over to the man and jerked him by the arm. "Stop it!" I screamed. "Stop thinking you can come in fuck up our lives!" I yelled even louder. The man flapped his wings and ran off, shaking his head in disbelief that I could see past the faux feathers and poor acting.
I woke with a headache and a mild feeling of bitterness. I don't like it when my subconscious morphs my past like that.
Wednesday, December 19, 2012
Wednesday, November 21, 2012
One Day I'll Fly Away
I had two more dreams about you the other night.
I was unable to get them down the day of, and honestly I can't remember the specific days they occurred last week, but I had two across two different nights.
The first one was interesting. I found you online. I'm not sure how, but I did. You had become a gamer and invited me to this world of webcams, voice chats, and avatars. Hesitantly I joined you and began to follow you around in this virtual world. You introduced me to your friends, but introductions didn't really have to be made. I knew them. It was Armor and his brother. You other friend was there, but I couldn't remember his name, just his voice. And then, over the intercom came a very familiar voice. She laughed and greeted me sadistically. She made some joke about me that I didn't understand, though everyone else thought it was hysterical. You told me this was your life now and understood. You let me play the game with your group, but it was never forgotten that I was the outsider.
The second was brief and powerful. I walked into a dark room. There was a table in the corner with a lamp over head. I lit up a cigarette and walked towards the empty table. You met me on the other side, a deck of cards in your hands and a cigarette hanging limply from your lips. We both burned orange for the same second and blew smoke into the air. "Ready for a game?" You asked, and I nodded my head. I can't remember what we played, but it was quick and you won. I smiled and woke up.
I was unable to get them down the day of, and honestly I can't remember the specific days they occurred last week, but I had two across two different nights.
The first one was interesting. I found you online. I'm not sure how, but I did. You had become a gamer and invited me to this world of webcams, voice chats, and avatars. Hesitantly I joined you and began to follow you around in this virtual world. You introduced me to your friends, but introductions didn't really have to be made. I knew them. It was Armor and his brother. You other friend was there, but I couldn't remember his name, just his voice. And then, over the intercom came a very familiar voice. She laughed and greeted me sadistically. She made some joke about me that I didn't understand, though everyone else thought it was hysterical. You told me this was your life now and understood. You let me play the game with your group, but it was never forgotten that I was the outsider.
The second was brief and powerful. I walked into a dark room. There was a table in the corner with a lamp over head. I lit up a cigarette and walked towards the empty table. You met me on the other side, a deck of cards in your hands and a cigarette hanging limply from your lips. We both burned orange for the same second and blew smoke into the air. "Ready for a game?" You asked, and I nodded my head. I can't remember what we played, but it was quick and you won. I smiled and woke up.
Saturday, November 3, 2012
Damn You
I had a dream about you last night...
Forgive me, it was spotty and there are a lot of gaps.
I was walking around campus and we ran into each other. Literally we did. I took a step back and apologized with my face down like I usually do. And you said it was okay, which caught my attention. I looked up at you and my entire body lit up with joy. In one quick motion I launched myself into a tight embrace around your tall and broad frame. You held me so close. I could smell you and it brought tears to my eyes. It was so comforting.
You set me down and I looked at myself, wondering if I looked alright. "What are you doing here?" I asked. "I live here now." "But I thought you left?" "Well, I lived in Portland for awhile." You explained. I rolled my eyes and shook my head. "Funny, I was going to move there." I informed.
We began walking and we went from being on campus to being in some quad. It was dark and it had been raining. It didn't bother me though. "I have to get to the airport." You said and I frowned. "But why?" "My great uncle died. Please will you be with me?" I couldn't say no, even though I had to work later. I took your hand and we began to run all over the city, getting everything we needed to get you back. Your brother was always waiting in the distance. I stopped midway through our adventure. "What happened to her?" I asked and you looked a little surprised. "Oh...We were engaged but we separated. She's long gone now." "I figured she'd be the one here." "Oh no, she's back here. She loves this place. You know that." Of course I did..."We're still kind of together, but not really." I didn't understand what you meant, but I went along with it anyhow.
It grew to be dark and I realized I had never gone to work. As we went back to campus, I noticed all three of my bosses were there and looking disappointed. I explained you were a dear friend of mine and I had to be with you, you needed me. They rolled their eyes and walked away. I turned around to tell you that everything would be alright and you were gone.
My eyes flew open and I took in such a sharp inhale that I felt dizzy. In a moment I registered that I was in my apartment, it was still dark, and you weren't really there. I fell back asleep with tears in my eyes knowing now it was only a dream. When I really woke up, someone asked if I was okay. They said I looked sad. "Just tired." I told them and pushed your face far into the recesses of my mind.
Forgive me, it was spotty and there are a lot of gaps.
I was walking around campus and we ran into each other. Literally we did. I took a step back and apologized with my face down like I usually do. And you said it was okay, which caught my attention. I looked up at you and my entire body lit up with joy. In one quick motion I launched myself into a tight embrace around your tall and broad frame. You held me so close. I could smell you and it brought tears to my eyes. It was so comforting.
You set me down and I looked at myself, wondering if I looked alright. "What are you doing here?" I asked. "I live here now." "But I thought you left?" "Well, I lived in Portland for awhile." You explained. I rolled my eyes and shook my head. "Funny, I was going to move there." I informed.
We began walking and we went from being on campus to being in some quad. It was dark and it had been raining. It didn't bother me though. "I have to get to the airport." You said and I frowned. "But why?" "My great uncle died. Please will you be with me?" I couldn't say no, even though I had to work later. I took your hand and we began to run all over the city, getting everything we needed to get you back. Your brother was always waiting in the distance. I stopped midway through our adventure. "What happened to her?" I asked and you looked a little surprised. "Oh...We were engaged but we separated. She's long gone now." "I figured she'd be the one here." "Oh no, she's back here. She loves this place. You know that." Of course I did..."We're still kind of together, but not really." I didn't understand what you meant, but I went along with it anyhow.
It grew to be dark and I realized I had never gone to work. As we went back to campus, I noticed all three of my bosses were there and looking disappointed. I explained you were a dear friend of mine and I had to be with you, you needed me. They rolled their eyes and walked away. I turned around to tell you that everything would be alright and you were gone.
My eyes flew open and I took in such a sharp inhale that I felt dizzy. In a moment I registered that I was in my apartment, it was still dark, and you weren't really there. I fell back asleep with tears in my eyes knowing now it was only a dream. When I really woke up, someone asked if I was okay. They said I looked sad. "Just tired." I told them and pushed your face far into the recesses of my mind.
Saturday, October 27, 2012
I'm Here Without You
I had a dream about you last night.
I found your brother. He knew me, more than I thought, and took me to see you. We pulled up to an old warehouse and he warned me. He said you were different. We both stepped out of the jeep and walked in. The warehouse was much bigger on the inside. It was covered in soot and ash and things were falling apart. It was like the attic in Edward Scissor hands.
You spotted your brother first, and you spoke for a minute. I stood behind and watched you. Finally your eyes glanced in my direction. Your eyes went wide as if you were startled. You walked past your brother and came up to me, asking if I was really there. You touched my face and stared in to my eyes. I felt young again.
You pulled your hand away and turned around. I now noticed you were covered in soot. "He works in the coal mines." Your brother said. "It's been awhile since he's had company." He added. I looked between the two of you and nodded my head. "Where is she?" I finally asked. "She's dead." You said, and your entire frame nearly crumpled. My heart jumped in my throat and I felt as though I would faint. I walked up to you, my hand outstretched to rest on your big shoulder, and then I noticed all the news papers and pictures scattered on the floor. It was like a shrine to her. "We didn't last six months...But she died after we split." I could hear the guilt in your voice. I pulled my hand away and took a step back, questioning if I should really be there. "But you're here now and I don't know what to do." You said as you turned around to look at me.
"I know...But it's complicated." You didn't understand "It's funny really...I just wanted to see if you were okay. I'm a stupid woman." I could tell the words were starting to make sense to you. "You see its not so simple. I'm engaged. I gave a man my word." You gripped my wrist and pushed me up against the wall. "You think this is some game!?" You yelled at me and my entire body froze. "You think you can come here and do this!?" You asked and I couldn't bare to look you in the eye. "I feel nothing!" Your words stung as they hit my ears. Your large hand let me go and I fell into a heap. I wanted to cry but I couldn't, all I could do was stare at you. "I'll let it go for you." I whispered, and from that moment on I somehow convinced you to leave with me.
As in any dream, things got weird. Creatures came out of walls and people who know me couldn't remember my name. It was futuristic and nostalgic at the same time. All I know is when I woke up I couldn't remember the date or where I was. Everything was so real.
I found your brother. He knew me, more than I thought, and took me to see you. We pulled up to an old warehouse and he warned me. He said you were different. We both stepped out of the jeep and walked in. The warehouse was much bigger on the inside. It was covered in soot and ash and things were falling apart. It was like the attic in Edward Scissor hands.
You spotted your brother first, and you spoke for a minute. I stood behind and watched you. Finally your eyes glanced in my direction. Your eyes went wide as if you were startled. You walked past your brother and came up to me, asking if I was really there. You touched my face and stared in to my eyes. I felt young again.
You pulled your hand away and turned around. I now noticed you were covered in soot. "He works in the coal mines." Your brother said. "It's been awhile since he's had company." He added. I looked between the two of you and nodded my head. "Where is she?" I finally asked. "She's dead." You said, and your entire frame nearly crumpled. My heart jumped in my throat and I felt as though I would faint. I walked up to you, my hand outstretched to rest on your big shoulder, and then I noticed all the news papers and pictures scattered on the floor. It was like a shrine to her. "We didn't last six months...But she died after we split." I could hear the guilt in your voice. I pulled my hand away and took a step back, questioning if I should really be there. "But you're here now and I don't know what to do." You said as you turned around to look at me.
"I know...But it's complicated." You didn't understand "It's funny really...I just wanted to see if you were okay. I'm a stupid woman." I could tell the words were starting to make sense to you. "You see its not so simple. I'm engaged. I gave a man my word." You gripped my wrist and pushed me up against the wall. "You think this is some game!?" You yelled at me and my entire body froze. "You think you can come here and do this!?" You asked and I couldn't bare to look you in the eye. "I feel nothing!" Your words stung as they hit my ears. Your large hand let me go and I fell into a heap. I wanted to cry but I couldn't, all I could do was stare at you. "I'll let it go for you." I whispered, and from that moment on I somehow convinced you to leave with me.
As in any dream, things got weird. Creatures came out of walls and people who know me couldn't remember my name. It was futuristic and nostalgic at the same time. All I know is when I woke up I couldn't remember the date or where I was. Everything was so real.
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